Helping Your Growing Connection!

Woo-hoo! We made it! Welcome to the 12th day of the 12 Days of Christmas project! (If you are just joining the project now, you can get the full low-down here: https://thighhighbootcamp.com/2012/12/18/welcome-to-the-12-days-of-christmas-project/  and I really recommend that you start the project at Day 1 to get the full benefit!)

Help is at hand!

Help is at hand!

Today’s post comes in the shape of a short video and it’s all about supporting your continuing success in developing a positive relationship between mind and body, a nourishing relationship which will support your weight loss journey! The video is about the importance of support and offers some suggestions about where to find helpful resources.

Here are some of the resources I mention :

1. My Live Events And 1-1 Coaching Packages

You can find out more about my approach and my live events here http://www.thighhighbootcamp.com  Keep an eye on my website for up-coming tele-seminars too! If you’re interested in 1-1 coaching via Skype, telephone or face-to-face, just get in touch via email or phone and we can take it from there. You can find all my contact details here : https://thighhighbootcamp.com/how-to-contact-jane/

2. Find Me On Facebook And Twitter

Facebook : http://www.facebook.com/ThighHighBootcamp

Twitter : http://www.twitter.com/TheBodyWizard

3. Kate Trafford ~ Cruise Control For Life

Kate’s a goal-setting guru and a muse for effortless success! You can sign up to her FREE  blog ,and find other useful resources,  on her website here http://www.katetrafford.com/

4. Tiffany Kay ~ Your Life Two

You can sign up for Tiffany’s FREE three-part video series to help you to re-discover your mid-life mojo here http://www.yourlifetwo.com/

5. Jevon Dangeli ~ Coach , NLP and Hypnosis Trainer

There’s a real treasure trove of free resources to be found here http://jevondangeli.com/ and you can find Jevon’s weight loss CD here http://jevondangeli.com/effortless-weight-loss-or-your-money-back/ (you can listen in to an excerpt too!)

Peace On Earth!

Peace On Earth!

And finally…… It’s been an absolute privilege to share the last 12 days with you all. I appreciate your comments and your emails and I really hope you’ve enjoyed getting to know your body and your appetite in new ways. When you’re deeply connected to your body;  when you’re deeply connected to yourself in a peaceful, joyful and loving way…  you might find yourself connecting to others , to the world around you and to your own life purpose in new ways too.

Imagine what might happen if we all were able to connect in ways like this. Well… I think there would probably be PEACE ON EARTH 🙂 (Did you get the message in the end?!)

Gotta run 🙂 !

JT

© Jane Talbot 2013

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Trust Transforms!

Welcome to the 11th day of the 12 Days of Christmas project! (If you are just joining the project now, you can get the full low-down here: https://thighhighbootcamp.com/2012/12/18/welcome-to-the-12-days-of-christmas-project/  and I really recommend that you start the project at Day 1 to get the full benefit!)

Yesterday’s post was all about gaining more insights and reviewing progress. And today? Well, today’s the day. This is the big one. If you can crack this, you’re pretty much well on your way to staying “on track” for the long term (and enjoying it!).

Trust is the key!

Trust is the key!

Today’s post is all about learning to trust your body again. And it’s not just about your learning to trust your body, it’s all about your body learning to trust you too! If, in the past, you trusted  “outside” information to determine what/when/how to eat and if you  stopped trusting your real appetite, if you stopped respecting and processing your emotions .. well, it might just be time to start relating to your body in a new way.

Trust is a crucial element of a mutually respectful, loving relationship. If the trust has been broken between you and your body, healing this trust can transform your relationship.

Chances are, you’re in a relationship right now with another person or you’ve experienced relationships in the past. And you may have had experiences of broken trust too or know people who have experienced it. And that means, you’ve probably got a fair bit of expertise in this field already. If you were to give advice on how to build trust in a relationship, what would it be? Can you think of at least 5 different ways to build trust in a relationship and then apply them to the relationship between you and your body?

Here are the 5 ways I came up with :

Take small steps!

Take small steps!

1. Start small You can build confidence and trust in your body by handing over “responsibility” for small things to start with. Whilst your body is a powerful, intelligent organism capable of both managing your appetite and regulating your weight, “you” may not be able to fully trust its capability yet. What is one small thing, one small responsibility you could give back to your body to show that you are beginning to trust it?

Idea : Every time you eat, check in with your body to see if you can gauge how hungry you are. Check whether it’s physiological hunger or an emotion. What’s important to start with, is not how good you are at determining how hungry you are – it’s the act of checking in the first place. The message to your body is “ I am genuinely trying to listen to you. I trust you are giving me some helpful information here. I may not know what that information is but I know it’s important.”

If that feels too much to start with, think of other body signals that you may not always respect, like a sleep signal. Do you ever get to the point in the evening when your body says sleep and your mind says “let’s stay up an watch the film”?. Do you think you could respect that signal and go to sleep? Again the message to your body is “I’m starting to listen. I know you are doing your best to maintain optimal health. I trust your judgement and I’m acting on it.”

Look for the things you can trust!

Look for the things you can trust!

2. Look for the things you can trust, rather than the things you can’t trust yet Often in relationships where trust has been broken, the “wounded” party wants to build trust again but finds themselves always looking for evidence of the behaviour that broke the trust in the first place. For example, if a partner had an affair, the “wounded” party is constantly on the look- out for all the signs of another affair (rather than on constant look- out for all the evidence that their partner is remaining faithful). So, within the context of your relationship with you body, make a list of at least 10 things that you totally trust about it. Consider this question every day and notice how quickly the list grows!

Idea : Write down your list, starting with the phrase “I totally trust my body to ….” Example ~ I totally trust my body to regulate my heart rate. I totally trust my body to grow my finger and toe nails. (Get the idea?)

3. Be honest, be open and be prepared to have the not-so-easy conversations Learning to communicate with your body in an honest way, and being prepared to “stay in the conversation” when things get tough, is key to building trust. The message to your body is “I’m not running away. I’m not just going to switch off the trust. By learning more about you, and by seeking to understand your needs and your motivations, I’m in a better position to build a trusting relationship with you.”

Idea : Have a regular “date” with your body. Set a period of time to one side every week for just you and your body. Get things off your chest (both of you!) and talk about the real stuff. You can use the process I described on the 4th Day of Christmas (that Barry Manilow is a very helpful guy, you know! :)) Using this process also helps to build empathy (something that can really support trust-building). https://thighhighbootcamp.com/2012/12/28/connect-communicate-and-collaborate/

Become a cheerleader!

Become a cheer-leader!

4. Acknowledge your partner’s strengths : become a cheer-leader! We’ve probably all been to dinner parties where we’ve met a couple who quite obviously aren’t getting along. They pick and dig at each other, constantly undermining their relationship. And they even do it in public! (Woo-hoo! Hello! Wake-up call coming straight at ya!) How would you feel if someone did that to you? How do you think your body experiences your digs and prods (in public too!)?

If you’re serious about re-building your relationship with your body, and about establishing a climate of trust, then it’s time to start acknowledging your body’s strengths – and then RAVING about them (even in public!) The message to your body is something like this “ I may not have been so good at letting you know this in the past but I want to be with you. Just you. I admire you. You’ve stuck by me through thick-and-thin – literally. I’m in it for the long haul. I want us both to feel really good about being in this relationship. You can trust the fact that I genuinely admire you. I’m proud of you. And to build that trust, I’m going to keep reminding you that I’m on your side. Just like you’ve been on mine.”

Idea : Every day, look at your body and find one thing you love about it. Now go for it with the gushing! Really get yourself into the “I really love this” feeling (you know how to do this now, right?) .A brilliant example of this feeling is in Saturday Night Fever when Doreen says “I love to watch you dance, Tony!” She adores him and when she says these words, we totally believe her because her whole body is giving that message too. So get your Doreen on and get going with the adoration 🙂

Here are some ideas to get you started :

“I just LOVE the way my eyes sparkle when …….”

“It’s incredible how I can let other people know what I’m feeling without having to say a word. What an amazing thing!”

“I adore how my eyebrows tell the whole story by….”

“I’m in awe of my own heartbeat. When I feel it, it makes me realise ……”

Advanced Method 🙂 After I’ve done this exercise, I usually share an Austin Powers moment with myself in front of the mirror : I give myself a wink and say “It’s good to be me!”. This step is completely optional ~ although, I can’t recommend it highly enough. It really makes me giggle 🙂

Be predictable in new ways!

Be predictable in new ways!

5. Be predictable If your partner says they will be at home at 7pm and they always are, it builds trust. Now, thinking in terms of the relationship between you and your body, can your body predict you and can you predict it? I bet, in the past, your body may have been pretty confident that if it gave you a loud and clear “stop eating now!”signal , you wouldn’t stop at all! So now, you’ve got the opportunity to show your body how predictable you can be in a new way, so trust grows between you 🙂

Decide on one thing you can do every day (something that will support your weight loss journey) which will let your body know that it can rely on you. Make sure this behaviour is so regular, that it becomes predictable.

Idea :  (I’m saying this in a very quiet and gentle voice 🙂 and I’ve just winked at you too in an Austin Powers way). Do something physical (your body will love you for it!). 5 minutes a day will do the trick as long as you do it every day and become predictable.

You could stretch, you could dance, you could go for a walk, you could… (well you’ve got the general direction I’m headed in, right?)

Phew – so that’s us done for today! It’s really worth journaling your journey towards a trusting relationship with your body : it’ll probably be a deeply moving experience! And if you’re reading this, wondering whether it’s worth building a trusting relationship with your body, all I can say is that it’s the best thing I ever did for myself.

It's true love!

It’s true love!

I feel privileged to own my body. I am in awe of its strength and tenderness. I love the way it supports me and communicates with me.I love the way it moves. Most of all, I feel that I always have “someone” on my side .. and now, I feel there is no gap between me and my body. We are close, inseparable and deeply connected : walking each other home 🙂 (That’s right, I’m crying : it’s a true love story and it’s okay to cry at those!)

Here are what some of the women who’ve experienced the Thigh-High Boot Camp programme say about their journey with Trust :

Julie is more than 2 stone lighter since boot camp!

Julie is more than 2 stone lighter since boot camp!

Julie (attended Thigh-High Boot Camp in Portrush, Northern Ireland, June 2012) “I spent such a long time in my life not being in touch with my body and hating it. At boot camp, I began an exciting journey to get me back in touch with my body again and what an exciting journey that is! (I’m well on the way to reaching my final destination of overall fabulousness :)). One of the key things I’ve learned is that my body is actually a pretty amazing thing and knows what it’s doing. I’m beginning to trust my body to do the best for me and it’s giving me fabulous results. No guilt, losing weight in an effortless way, getting excited about exercise and generally feeling so much better about myself, my body and my life. Drop the conscious control and guilt and trust your body. The great thing is that when you tune into your body and actually listen to it, it’ll tell you LOUD and CLEAR exactly what it needs. I’m certainly excited about what 2013 will bring!”

Kate

Kate

Kate (attended Thigh-High Boot Camp in Drymen, Scotland, October 2012) “Tuning in to my authentic appetite has been a revelation. It turns out that the part of myself I believed I could trust the least is the part that most deserves my trust and respect.”

Stephanie

Stephanie

Stephanie (attended the programme in Scotland, August 2010) “It’s been a journey… Now I don’t think, I feel. And I feel pretty darn good. And when I’m feeling, I’m not analysing : I am not focusing on losing weight/ body fat. It is just happening. And I’m having what I want when I want. What I want has changed a lot, what appeals to me has changed.”

Gotta run 🙂 ! (#Predictable :))

JT

© Jane Talbot 2013

 

 

Ready For The Next Epiphany?

You're getting even more enlightened!

You’re getting even more enlightened!

Welcome to the 10th day of the 12 Days of Christmas project! (If you are just joining the project now, you can get the full low-down here : https://thighhighbootcamp.com/2012/12/18/welcome-to-the-12-days-of-christmas-project/  and I really recommend that you start the project at Day 1 to get the full benefit!)

Yesterday’s post was all about learning how to be a pilot 🙂 so that you can be confident that you are heading in the right direction – and be aware when you’re wiggling 🙂  (That word makes me giggle!)

And today? Well, it’s already Day 10 and that means that the 12 Days of Christmas project is nearing its end. I thought that today might be a lovely opportunity to check in with what you’re learning as we did on the 5th day. As you continue to check in, I hope you’ll be pleasantly surprised at the progress you’re making, the changes that are occurring and the insights you are gaining. How much more have you learned since the last “Epiphany” on Day 5?

What are you learning that's of value to you?

What are you learning that’s of value to you?

Activity 1 : Your Second Epiphany! As you look back over the whole project , what are the 3 most significant gifts (in terms of learning, insight and awareness) that engaging with this process has brought to you ?  What is changing as a result of your learning? What have you learned in the last 5 days that’s different to what you learned in the first 5?

Activity 2 : Complete The Following Statements

1.Right now food means __________ to me.

2. I would describe my relationship with my body as ______________

3. I know I’m present in my body when ________________________

4. When I look in the mirror I say to myself _____________________

5. Considering the future, in terms of my relationship with food and with my body, I feel ___________________________________________

6. The thought of processing my emotions without the help of food is ____

7. I could support myself on my weight loss journey by ______________

8. My body is ___________________________________________

9. I am becoming more _____________________________________

10. It’s now time for me to stop __________ and to start _____________

The best way to do this exercise is to be as honest as you can! Let whatever comes up, come out 🙂 And as you consider how you’ve completed each of the statements, what are you noticing? What’s changed? What’s new? What would you like to resolve? Are you heading in the right direction for you? (You may sense more statements coming up naturally : let ’em out and learn!)

If anything comes up that you’re not comfortable with, ask yourself this question: “So, this is how/what I’m feeling/thinking/talking/experiencing right now. How do I want to be different?” (Just a wee nudge – remember to answer this positively. Not how you don’t want to be BUT how you DO want to be!)

Remember to fuel the flames!

Remember to fuel the flames!

As you ask this question, you might want to revisit my post on goal-setting and how to get in the mood for action!  Here’s the link : https://thighhighbootcamp.com/2013/01/01/energising-action/

As soon as you feel the powerful, positive state emerging, just ask yourself what’s the next smallest step I could take to help me to keep heading in the right direction? (Then take it 🙂 and use your pilot’s licence :)).

Please feel free to share your learning :sometimes what you’re learning can be a fabulous gift for others (and can really help pennies to drop!)

So that’s us for Day 10 (oh and if you are playing the Get The Message game, we are already on the 3rd and final word..Just 2 more letters to go – but I’m sure, even with a few letters missing,  you’ve got the complete message already!)

Gotta run :)!

JT

© Jane Talbot 2013

 

Act In A Response-Able Way!

Welcome to the 9th day of the 12 Days of Christmas project! (If you are just joining the project now, you can get the full low-down here: https://thighhighbootcamp.com/2012/12/18/welcome-to-the-12-days-of-christmas-project/  and I really recommend that you start the project at Day 1 to get the full benefit!)

Yesterday’s post was all about setting goals, harnessing the positive energy attached to your goals and taking your first small step towards success. I wonder how well it went for you?  More importantly, I wonder how you will recognise whether it’s going well for you now and in the future!

Your ability to recognise whether you are “on track”, heading in the direction of your outcomes, or not “on track” is really important. If you recognise that you are not “on track”, then it’s really important to be able to take appropriate action, to make fine adjustments, to make sure you’re heading towards success.

Be like a pilot!

Be like a pilot!

I remember someone telling me once about training to be a pilot. I was fascinated to learn that if you track an actual (as opposed to “planned”) flight-path from A to B, it never turns out to be a straight line : it’s always a wiggle! I learned that planes spend quite a bit of time “off- track” and that the pilot’s job is to pay attention to all the dials in the cockpit, so that he can see when the “wiggle” starts and take action (increase speed, lift the nose, bank slightly and so on). So, it’s not only about knowing where you want to land, it’s also about checking that you are always headed in the right direction and taking appropriate and timely action should you “wiggle” :).

If you spent yesterday setting or re-setting weight loss, wellness or fitness goals, the most helpful thing you could do for yourself right now is to:

1. Decide which “dials” you can pay attention to that will help you determine whether you need to take action or confirm you are “on-track”

2. Turn up your “sensory acuity” so you can pick up / interpret the information from the “dials” as soon as there is any change.

3. Be ready to take action, make adjustments and re-check the dials to make sure the adjustment had the desired effect.

Learn how to read the dials!

Learn how to read the dials!

The Dials : If you take a look at the answers to the questions I asked you yesterday, you’ll find some of the key dials for your cockpit. What will you be tracking? Your weight loss? Your body fat percentage? The size of the clothes you are wearing? Your resting heart rate? How comfortable you are feeling in your body? How much you recognise yourself in the mirror as “the real you”? How much energy you’ve got? How well you’re listening to and respecting your appetite? Your relationship with your body?

Look at your answers to yesterdays question and decide what’s best for you to track.

Sensory Acuity This bit is really all about your response – ability. It’s all very well having dials but you have to know how to read the dials and interpret the information in a way which will inform intelligent action.

Let’s take an example dial of “your relationship with your body”. In order to “read” this dial, you might engage a range of senses :

1. When you look at your body, how do you feel (are you feeling more or less positive)?

2. When you look at yourself in the mirror, what are you saying to yourself (are you hearing positive self-talk or not so positive self-talk?)

3. When you sit down to eat, how much attention are you paying to your physiological appetite (To what degree are present when you’re eating? Are you becoming more skilled at recognising the difference between emotional signals and genuine appetite signals? Are you more or less connected to the physiological feelings? Are you respecting the feelings or not? Are you stopping when you are satisfied or are you continuing to eat? Do you know the feeling of satisfaction? How much better are you at recognising the feeling of satisfaction? Are you only eating when you are physiologically hungry?

4. Do you trust your body? (How do you know? What are you feeling, seeing, hearing or experiencing that lets you know that you’re trusting your body – or not?)

Response-Able Action Having interpreted the dials , you now know the degree to which you are “on track” or not! If you are heading in the right direction : great ~ just keep an eye on the dials! If you’re “wiggling” a little, make an appropriate adjustment! Let’s say, for example, I realise that  I’m not moving in the right dial direction with the relationship with my body because I’m not fully present when I’m eating. A response-able action might be to renew my Day 1 “Pleasure Permit” (I forgot to mention that your Pleasure Permit is valid for life, by the way!) or I might use my Entry Permit from Day 2 to re-connect with my body.

Top Tips!

1. When assessing the validity of your adjustments, you might find this question helpful : “Is the action I’m about to take going to move me towards or away from my outcome ?”

2. “Wiggling” is part of the journey : it can give you new insights and new perspectives (all the best pilots do it :)). In fact, you might even want to giggle when you wiggle because when you’re wiggling, your learning – and the more you learn, the more intelligent the subsequent action will be!

Additional Resources If you’d enjoy some more top tips for “effortless success” in 2013, you might like to join the brilliant Kate Trafford over at Cruise Control For Life. Yesterday, she launched a series of posts which you’ll find really helpful if you are in “New Year Resolution” mode! There’s a feast of learning to be had (and she’s a total goal-setting guru and a muse for effortless success!)  http://katetrafford.typepad.com/cruisecontrol/

Gotta run :)! (#Giggling-While-I’m-Wiggling :))

JT

© Jane Talbot 2013

Energising Action!

Welcome to the 8th day of the 12 Days of Christmas project! (If you are just joining the project now, you can get the full low-down here: https://thighhighbootcamp.com/2012/12/18/welcome-to-the-12-days-of-christmas-project/  and I really recommend that you start the project at Day 1 to get the full benefit!)

First things first : a very happy New Year to you and I hope this post finds you in fine fettle! Yesterday’s post was all about developing your own nutritional philosophy and today’s post acknowledges what many of us may be doing today : setting intentions for 2013. We’re going to be taking a look at how to set outcomes and take action geared towards achieving your outcomes, geared towards helping you to “stay on track”!

Learn how to fuel the flames of action!

Learn how to fuel the flames of action!

Last night, I spent a wonderful evening in front of a roaring fire. The Christmas tree sparkled in the corner .The dog stretched out in bliss. My partner, Ian and I sat all cosy on the sofa. I felt a deeply satisfying sense of “home”. (If Barry Manilow had been playing on the stereo and my partner had been wearing his Indiana Jones hat, it would have been the icing on the Christmas cake :)).

As you and I have known each other for 7  full days, I feel I can be open with you. Truth be told, last night I was so in the mood. Conditions were perfect 🙂

If you are blushing whilst reading this, relax! I was in the mood for setting an intention, for setting a goal of moving into,and making, a new home in 2013.And the conditions were perfect for setting that intention because I was already experiencing what it would be like to feel completely at home. Let me explain a little more…

Feeling completely “at home” last night was a really big deal for me because it has been a very long time since I have felt at home. I moved from Scotland to Northern Ireland in Summer 2011. I moved from my own home into someone else’s. I thought I would soon feel at home but I didn’t.Even with the prospect of my partner and I moving into a farmhouse that we could renovate and “make our home”, I just couldn’t get excited about it. I couldn’t even talk about it without feeling quite distant and totally disconnected. I didn’t unpack a lot of my belongings (they, like me, just didn’t seem to belong!) and I often thought about Scotland. Ian kept taking me to the farmhouse, asking for layout suggestions, colour schemes and even oven specifications (he knows I love cooking and hoped that would get me interested in the house move). None of it lit any kind of flame at all in me.  So, here we are right now in January 2013 and we are still not moved in. And, until last night, I felt like we were still living in a “stop-gap” house in Limbo, County Antrim. Nothing felt permanent. It didn’t feel like home at all.

Positive energy can be a powerful force!

Positive energy can be a powerful force!

Last night it all changed.  Feeling the intensely satisfying feelings of connection, love, belonging and home, I heard myself set an intention to move into the farmhouse. That’s right – whilst I was feeling all those good feelings, the words just popped out! Ian and I talked the house into life as the embers warmed our imaginations. I could see it right in front of me, I could smell the food from the farmhouse kitchen, I could hear my son playing teenage music in the tree-house nearby and I could feel myself belonging to that place. I could feel myself in the bricks and in the roots of the orchard trees and in the soil which would provide us with food. I was in a state of utter connectedness.

When Ian realised that I had “moved in” right in front of his very eyes, he asked me, “What’s one small step we could take, to get the wheels in motion for our move?”

After I’ve published this post, I’ll be checking out internet coverage. That’s my next small step that will take me closer to my outcome. And guess what state I might want to be in while I’m taking that step? That’s right, I’ll be getting myself into the “feeling at home” state, the feeling of “utter connectedness”. That way, I’ll be feeling really good while I’m taking the action and any following small steps I plan will be pulled along by the positive energy attached to my goal (to make a new home). My focus is clearly set on making Northern Ireland my home, rather than on a wistful ache for Scotland.

So, if you’re sitting there, scratching your head and asking “what’s this got to do with me making a New Year’s resolution about weight loss ?” Well, if you think back to times in the past when you’ve resolved to lose weight once and for all – and then found it an incredible struggle to keep your resolve, chances are that you may not have been in the optimal state for setting your goal / intention or for taking action. And the chances are that when you considered the steps to achieving your goal, it suddenly looked huge and overwhelming because you felt pressure to do it all at once!

Keep your attention and energy heading in the direction pf your outcome!

Keep your attention, energy and action heading in the right direction!

Today, I’m going to share with you a process for setting your intentions for 2013 which helps you to focus on what you do want, rather than what you don’t want. So, I was focused on not feeling at home, feeling disconnected and Scotland ~ rather than focusing on feeling at home, belonging and Northern Ireland. People who want to lose weight often focus on how bad they feel about their body instead of how good they’d like to be feeling about it, for example. Is the penny beginning to drop about what happens when your focus, attention and energy is not fully aligned with your outcome? Achieving your outcome may turn out to be less than easy, right? The process I am about to share with you will also help you to identify and access the powerful positive states attached to your outcome, so that you can use this energy to plan and take the next step. And the invitation is to take small steps : this way change will be evolving gradually and it will feel more manageable as you experience regular small successes that keep you heading in the right direction.

Here’s How To Do It Ask yourself the following questions (I give some example answers just to help clarify the process). Go into the changing room of life and try the questions on fully 🙂

1. What do you want? (State your outcome positively and in the present )

A : I am feeling comfortable, healthy and confident in my body. I am living a healthy for-lifestyle.

2. How will you know that you’ve got what you want? (What are you seeing, hearing, feeling that lets you know you’ve achieved your outcome? Engage all your senses!)

A : I am enjoying shopping for clothes. I am looking in the mirror and recognising myself for the first time in a very long time. My skin feels as though it fits perfectly. I feel like this body is me. I feel at home 🙂 I am taking real pleasure nourishing myself with food that my body enjoys. I am physically active.

3. When do you want it?

A wee tip here, if you’ve struggled with your weight in the past, you’re probably answering this with something like “tomorrow” or “yesterday” 🙂 . I understand that  AND I also know that very short time frames can pile on the pressure. So give this question some consideration, knowing that while you’re losing weight you are probably going to be in a much more positive state this time and you might even enjoy the process of becoming healthy! (And you know what happens when you give yourself permission for pleasure and you take all the pressure off, right?) When I took action to lose weight, I decided that I would achieve my goal at the perfect time for me and I would just concentrate on enjoying the “getting there” bit. I was clear about my outcome, I kept it in mind and I literally took one small step after the other until one day I realised I had “arrived” !

4. Having achieved your outcome, how will you be BEING different as a person? (This is the powerful positive energy that you can ride towards your outcome. The idea here is to actually experience this state of being now. The additional questions I ask help to bring the state of being to life.).

A : Unstoppable

What’s that like? Where do you feel it in your body? Does the feeling have a colour? Is it moving or still? Is it warm or cold? Where does the feeling start in your body?

A : Wow. It’s hot, red and really high-energy. It feels like it’s pulling me along. I can barely contain it. It’s right in my stomach and in my chest.

5. When you feel the positive state of being emerging (so you’re actually feeling the feelings), ask what’s the next smallest step you could take TODAY to move towards achieving your outcome?

A : I’m off for a 15-minute stroll.

(Reminder : evolution requires much less effort than revolution. Small steps soon add up as long as the small steps are heading in the right direction 🙂 )

And that’s all there is to it. We’ll talk more about achieving your outcomes tomorrow. In the meantime, I hope you really enjoy getting into some deliciously positive states that will energise your action! Oh – and do take the next smallest step and share your experiences in the comments box!(I’ll ask you how it went tomorrow :))

All this talk of being unstoppable has brought on a sudden urge! Are you in the mood for a change too?

Gotta run 🙂 !

JT

© Jane Talbot 2013

Nourishing Confidence!

Welcome to the 7th day of the 12 Days of Christmas project! (If you are just joining the project now, you can get the full low-down here: https://thighhighbootcamp.com/2012/12/18/welcome-to-the-12-days-of-christmas-project/  and I really recommend that you start the project at Day 1 to get the full benefit!)

Yesterday was all about your learning how to recognise an emotion by observing it ; how to learn from the emotion; andhow to process the emotion and let it go.

What am I serving up today?

What am I serving up today?

Today, I’m taking a slightly different tack and taking a look at food and the notion of “diets”. If you’ve been taking part in the 12 Days of Christmas project, you may be paying more attention to which foods support your eating pleasure ; you may have changed your mind about what pleasure means for you. You may be reconnecting with your body, with your appetite and with your emotions. You may even be developing confidence in your own ability to pay attention to your natural signals.

And there’s a powerful word : CONFIDENCE. As you’re developing confidence in your own body, as you begin to value and relate to your body in new ways, you might want to feed it in new ways too. How confident are you about making the right food choices for you?

How do you know what’s healthy for you and your body? Well, that’s a really good question. And there are a myriad of answers to be found in a multitude of dietary approaches. And whilst it can be helpful to keep connected to nutritional science’s latest conversation , it’s probably even more helpful to keep connected to your own inner nutritional guru. 

Here are my suggestions to help you find a way of eating that works for both you and your body :

1. It needs to be pleasurable (look good, smell good and feel good in your body).

2. Be fully respectful of the signals and feedback your body offers to you.

3. Experiment until you have designed a way of eating that is tailored to you.

4. Acknowledge that your body is changing all the time (this means that what you eat may need to change over time).

5. Develop a style of eating focused on health / energy / vitality rather than weight loss. (Ask yourself :  what do I want food to give me BEYOND weight loss?)

About Diets  There is a whole heap of information about diet, eating philosophies and nutrition available – in fact, there is so much information around that it’s not always easy to determine what’s going to work for you or be healthy for you. New ideas come and go and researchers are discovering new things all the time. Because nutritional science is in its infancy , this means we have to be courageous enough to make our own choices (we have to evaluate the science and do our homework too!) and we have to be confident enough to experiment and find out what works for our own body and our own mind.

Trust your inner nutritional guru!

Trust your inner nutritional guru!

I’m certainly not going to be prescribing any diets here! Rather, I’m suggesting that it’s all about your learning to make food choices that support your health. I’m suggesting it’s all about your having the confidence to develop a style of eating (your own nutritional philosophy) based on your own body wisdom and on your own assessment of anything new that nutritional science brings to the conversation. Being your own best nutritional guru is not only GREAT for your mind-body but it frees you from being driven exclusively by an external set of rules.

It Really Is Up To You! If I’d been writing this blog post 10 years ago, you would have seen a picture of the UK Healthy Eating Pyramid (with cereals and grains propping up the rest of the diet). That’s how I was trained when I studied nutrition : low fat and whole grain carbs as a basis for a healthy diet.

Since then, lots has changed . When I trained in over 10 years ago, they were just starting to talk about the notion of Glycaemic Indices (the rate at which foods release their sugar into the body and affect blood sugar levels).Now they talk about Glycaemic Load (GL) (ie. they are learning more and more all the time) and diets higher in protein and higher in fat are now being recommended (protein satisfies you and fat doesn’t always make you fat! That’s the latest conversation :))

How do you know if your way of eating is working for you?

How do you know if your way of eating is working for you?

Confused yet? Who wouldn’t be?! I’ve checked out every diet over the years (and tried out most when I was struggling with my weight). In the end, I decided to put my own stake in the ground : I developed an eating approach that works for me based on my own body wisdom and my own views on the science. Here are the guidelines that I developed for myself that help me to make choices about my style of eating / food . As you consider my guidelines, what would yours be? (Write them down, chew them over and them give it a whirl : experiment! You might be thrilled at your growing confidence in the area of nutrition :))

1.Do I believe the science? (With the internet, well-qualified friends and a basic understanding of what constitutes “good research”, you can begin to get a feel for whether an eating approach is worth trying!)

2. Do I feel satisfied eating in this way? (If I am hungry and constantly thinking about food ~ it’s not working for me!)

3. Do I feel energised and healthy?

4. Am I sleeping well?

5. Does my skin and hair look good?

6. Am I achieving / maintaining a healthy weight?

7. Do I enjoy eating this way?

8. Can I find the foods easily?

9. Does it support my lifestyle? (Can I run on this food? Can I compete on this food? Can I eat out with friends on this food?)

10. Is it sustainable in the longer term? (I couldn’t detox, juice-fast or Slimfast “shake it” for the rest of my life ~ and I bet you couldn’t either!)

11. IS THE FOOD “REAL”? (I avoid processed foods whenever possible : my body doesn’t like them!)

All In Good Time! Your body may take time to adapt to a new way of eating. Give your body and mind a chance to digest what you are offering to it.

Be an explorer of food!

Be an explorer of food!

Well, I think I’ve served up quite a healthy portion today, so I’ll leave you to get stuck in. And I’m going to leave you with a smile too 🙂 . This quote from Erma Bombeck always makes me giggle : “I am not a glutton – I am an explorer of food”.  Puts me in mind of Indiana Jones and those Lara Croft boots again 🙂

If Indy (he’s my favourite after Barry Manilow, by the way) were sitting next to me , I’d expect he’d offer the following advice to us all right now :

Go exploring!

Have an adventure!

Have fun!

You may get into some scrapes but you’ll sure learn fast!

Respect the magic : it’s powerful!

You’re more resourceful than you think!

If you find a puzzle, the solution isn’t probably what you expect it to be!

Trap doors aren’t so bad : if you fall down one, enjoy the ride (but remember where the trap door is for the next time)!

There is always treasure : follow the signs and symbols, crack the code and it’s yours :)!

Your enemy often turns out to be a great ally!

Gotta run 🙂 ! Oh – And do have a wonderful slide into 2013 tonight 🙂

JT ( If you are interested in 1-1 coaching or in attending a live Thigh-High Bootcamp event, please feel free to visit my website http://www.thighhighbootcamp.com for more info 🙂 The next live events are taking place in Northern Ireland – Portrush and Belfast in January and February ; and in England – Warrington in February).

© Jane Talbot 2012

Observe, Learn And Let Go!

When the shadow is respected, full beauty emerges.

When the shadow is respected, full beauty emerges.

Welcome to the 6th day of the 12 Days of Christmas project! (If you are just joining the project now, you can get the full low-down here: https://thighhighbootcamp.com/2012/12/18/welcome-to-the-12-days-of-christmas-project/  and I really recommend that you start the project at Day 1 to get the full benefit!)

Yesterday’s post was all about reviewing what you’ve learned so far (and it’s a really good idea to review your learning on a regular basis : you may be pleasantly surprised at how much progress you are making 🙂 )

Today is all about exploring the contents of your 3-day food diary in a little more detail. You may have guessed by this stage that the most useful aspect of this exercise isn’t necessarily the recording of the food you eat .Some of the most useful aspects of keeping such a diary are:

1. It helps you to become consciously aware of some automatic patterns you may be running (which may no longer be serving you).

2. It encourages you to spend time in your body so that you can get connected to physiological signals.

3. It helps you to re-learn the difference between an emotional signal and a physiological hunger signal.

Today, we’re going to focus on emotional signals . We’re going to learn how to recognise an emotion by observing it . We’re going to learn how to learn from the emotion (emotions are very powerful forms of communication : are you getting the message?). And finally, we are going to learn a simple technique to help you to process the emotion and let it go.

The theme of the 12 Days of Christmas project is all about your learning to “stay on track” naturally. One way of staying on track is to eat when you are hungry and stop when you are full: sounds so simple, doesn’t it? So why isn’t it that simple for all of us?

Well, it comes right back to being in your body. To be in touch with the signals, you really have to be close enough to the signal to hear it – that means getting back into your body and spending enough time there to know what each signal means. And when you know what each signal means, it’ about responding appropriately. Eat to respect a hunger signal : that seems obvious enough 🙂 But how do you respect an emotional signal?

Well, that’s what today’s activity is all about.

The Set-Up Take a look at your food diary and notice which emotions are present at the point at which you experience “hunger”. Which are your not-so-positive “regular visitors” 🙂 ? Sometimes, we are not sufficiently present in our body (or so out of touch with our emotions) that we are not able to name the emotion. If this sounds like you, check through your food diary for physiological feelings that didn’t feel good. Is there a pattern of physiological feelings that occurs at the point of “hunger”?

When I first got back into my body, I had absolutely no idea what anything meant at all! I experienced a lot of physical agitation and tenseness at the time of feeling “hunger”. I later decoded this message as “anxiety” (but it took me a while!)

A Little Note For Those Of You Who May Not Be Feeling Totally Comfortable Right Now. You are about to spend time with an emotion – and it’s been a while. It’s a bit like going on a date for the first time in a very long time and not even being sure whether you even like your date! You may be feeling nervous , even a little afraid  And you might want to respect those feelings by going gently with this process. You don’t have to dive in : just dip your toe in to start with. You might just want to start with Steps 1. and 2. After doing this several times (and noticing your increasing comfort), you can move further through the process. GO AT YOUR OWN PACE 🙂 And, if don’t feel ready to engage with your emotions on your own (and you have a genuine desire to get re-connected to them),I would suggest a 1-1 session with a professional. *

Step 1 : The next time you experience “hunger” or a desire to eat, check in with your body and see if one of your regular not-so-positive emotional visitors is present. (Or one of your regular physiological feelings that you don’t really enjoy). How do you know it’s there? What are you experiencing that lets you know that there is an “additional guest” at the table?

Step 2 : Once you know it’s present, welcome your guest in a way that is right for you (I know, it’s all very like Whoopi Goldberg in Ghost but it’s important to acknowledge its presence. You may not have acknowledged its presence for some while!)  If you can name the emotion at this stage, do so now. (I do this out loud.). Now invite your guest to leave your body and sit next to you : give the emotion its own place.

Tip : If your guest needs a little help leaving your body, give it a hand! Locate the feeling in your body and imagine pulling it out gently (it’s always good to be kind but sometimes they may need a bit of a tug!) and then place it beside you.

Observe!

Observe!

Step 3 : Observe your guest. Sit at a comfortable distance from the emotion or physiological feeling. How do you know that this feeling isn’t physiological hunger? (That’s important to ask if you were unable to name emotions in your food diary. If you realise that this is actually physiological hunger sitting next to you, thank it for its presence and take action :)). How do you know that this feeling is an emotion? What are you noticing about it? What are you noticing about your own internal responses? What does your guest remind you of? How is it relating to you? How are you relating to it? What are its distinctive qualities? (Answering this question can be really helpful in identifying this as an emotional signal rather than a hunger signal in the future). As time passes, what do you notice about your comfort level? Are you able to move your chair a little closer? What happens if you move it closer? What happens if you move it further away? What is the name of this emotion? Name it now if you were not able to name it at Step 1.

Step 3 : Learn from the emotion. Emotions are a very powerful means of non-verbal communication. After years of experiencing them, we develop skill at decoding the message. Once we get the message, our task then is to take congruent action : that is, respect the message in a way that is supportive of both our mind and our body (and beyond). As we begin to respect the message in this way, our emotions quieten : their job is done.

Sounds easy enough, right? Well, yes, if you’ve been in your body for some time and lived amongst your feelings and emotions (the good and the not so good) – in that case, it is easy. However, for those of us, who have only recently arrived back in our body, it may take a little time to get the message and it may take you a while to get used to the “noise” of emotions 🙂

As you sit next to the emotion, ask the following questions:

1 What message, of value to me, is this emotion communicating?

2.What is the positive intention of this emotion? (How is it trying to help me?)

3.What is there for me to learn from this emotion (of a positive nature), the learning of which would allow this feeling to go?

3.What is something I could do to respect the message, something that I feel aligned and okay with? (Avoid life-changing decisions and big commitments at this stage! Take a small step in the right direction 🙂 Learning to listen to your emotions counts as a step :))

4.Thank the emotion for its communication and for trying to help you. (If the help it is offering is no longer relevant for your life today , still thank it and explain how things have changed. This is a version of congruent action.).

Tip 1: If you get the message but you don’t take congruent action, your emotion is unlikely to quieten 🙂

Tip 2: It may take a short while for the insights to arrive. Be patient 🙂 If no answers come up immediately, just sit next to the emotion and wait. If after a while, nothing has come up, complete the process (the answers may arrive at a later time!)

Let it go!

Let it go!

Step 4 : Let it go. Once you have thanked the emotion, you can invite your guest to leave. I do this by imagining the emotion turning into the wind and blowing through my body. As the wind blows through my body, I feel the feeling and bid it good-bye, by name. You may enjoy a very gentle breeze, you may prefer the wind to blow around your body ,or away from your body, instead of through it (although having the emotion go through your body lets you get used to feeling feelings again – and that can be very helpful :)) or you may even prefer to design your own process for letting go!  

I have to tell you that the first time I tried this, I had a real epiphany moment at this stage. I realised that when it was time to let go of the feeling, I didn’t want to! The emotion I was working through at the time was sadness. As I looked at the sadness and acknowledged everything it had done for me, everything it was trying to tell me, I became incredibly sad myself (I am actually crying as I am typing this). I realised that I had enjoyed spending time with my emotion : it felt sacred and I wanted to keep the connection.I was actually feeling the feeling for the first time in a long time. I wasn’t frightened of it at all. In fact, I was suddenly in awe of the gentleness and dignity with which this emotion had handled itself in its attempt to help. It was an utterly tender experience. It was at this very moment that I decided to start respecting my body. It was at this very moment that I decided to start respecting my emotions : all of them.

In a nutshell 🙂 By learning to recognise an emotion and its purpose, we can begin to respect our body and our emotions in new ways. Just pay attention to what’s happening the next time you experience hunger : are you getting the message in a different way? If you begin to listen to your emotions rather than feeding them, what happens?

I look forward to hearing how this works for you!

Gotta run  🙂 ! JT

Group experiences can be nourishing and nurturing!

Group experiences can be nourishing and nurturing!

*If you would like to discuss the possibility of 1-1 coaching sessions (face-to-face or via Skype) with me, do feel free to call or email. If you think that you might enjoy exploring/ resolving your emotional relationship with food in a group setting (it can be fun, transformational and extremely nurturing to work with a group of peolple who really get where you’re coming from), do consider coming along to a live event! The next live events are in Northern Ireland (in Portrush and in Belfast in January and February) and in the England (Warrington in February). Check out this page to find out more https://thighhighbootcamp.com/dates-venues-price/

© Jane Talbot 2012

Early Epiphany Alert!

The Three Kings brought gifts!

The Three Kings brought gifts!

Welcome to the 5th day of the 12 Days of Christmas project! (If you are just joining the project now, you can get the full low-down here: https://thighhighbootcamp.com/2012/12/18/welcome-to-the-12-days-of-christmas-project/  and I really recommend that you start the project at Day 1 to get the full benefit!)

If you are playing the “get the message” game (take the first letter from the title of each blog post, starting on the 1st day of Christmas, and by the 12th day, you’ll get the full message), today’s letter marks the end of the first word of the message 🙂

Yesterday’s post was all about your beginning to re-build a healthy relationship with your body and appetite based on a loving connection, honest communication and genuine collaboration.

Today’s post is all about reviewing what you’ve learned so far. It’s about considering what gifts this process of learning to “stay on track” has brought to you. That’s right – the Epiphany has come early! I think that the Epiphany (when the Three Kings arrived with gifts in the Christmas story) actually occurs on the 6th January but, as far as I’m concerned, the earlier the Epiphany, the better 🙂 As epiphany also means a higher level of awareness, a moment of enlightenment or revelation, it provides a perfect focus for today’s activities.

Activity 1 : Your Epiphany As you look back over the last 5 days (I suggest that you do this exercise at the END of today to coincide with the completion of your food diary), what are the 3 most significant gifts (in terms of learning, insight and awareness) that engaging with this process has brought to you so far? What is changing as a result of your learning?

Activity 2 : What Is Your Gold, Frankincense And Myrrh? To keep the Christmas theme going, you might also consider your learning gifts as gold, frankincense and myrrh. There are many theories about the significance of these gifts from the Three Kings. Many would say each gift has a spiritual meaning. So, let’s get creative and discover more gifts by asking some more questions 🙂 There’s always more to learn!

Gold

Gold

GOLD – It was thought that gold was offered as a symbol of kingship. So, with the benefit of your increasing awareness, who or what has been ruling you in the past? Who or what should be on the throne? How would you like your territory governed? Who or what will be the chief advisor? What kind of realm would you like to live in?

Frankincense

Frankincense

FRANKINCENSE – It was thought that frankincense was offered as a symbol of deity. Considering your body and your appetite :  what inspires awe? What do you now hold sacred? Which of your body’s “special powers” are you most grateful for? How will you honour your body from now on? Which rituals can you create to celebrate your body’s magic?

MYRRH – It was thought that myrrh was offered as symbol of death. So, within the context of your “staying on track”, what do you need to lay to rest? In order to enjoy a healthy relationship with your body and with food, what do you need to let go of? What are you noticing that’s coming to an end? What are you noticing that’s beginning now?

Myrrh

Myrrh

Enjoy unwrapping your gifts (Oh – and look after them : they might even last you a lifetime!). Feel free to share your learning gifts as a comment 🙂

Gotta run :)!

JT

© Jane Talbot 2012

 

Connect, Communicate and Collaborate!

Re-Connecting!

Re-Connecting!

Welcome to the 4th day of the 12 Days of Christmas project! (If you are just joining the project now, you can get the full low-down here: https://thighhighbootcamp.com/2012/12/18/welcome-to-the-12-days-of-christmas-project/  and I really recommend that you start the project at Day 1 to get the full benefit!)

Yesterday’s post was all about your going inside your body to locate your appetite and to learn about it. By getting back in touch with your appetite, you can begin listen to it and to build a respectful connection with it. We’ll review the results of your 3-day Appetite Awareness Action Adventure in a few days time 🙂

“Come on then! What’s on today’s menu?” (I know you are raring to go now 🙂 !) Well, today’s all about your deepening your connection with your appetite and your body.

Let’s just look at things from a relationship angle for a moment. Imagine being in a relationship (a couple) where one is communicating very clearly and the other isn’t listening or can’t understand the communication. Imagine a relationship where one is communicating honestly and directly and the other offers a wall of silence or disdain.  Imagine being in a relationship where one is doing nearly all the “housework” and the other takes it all for granted or just goes around making a mess. Imagine a relationship where one regularly offers thoughtful or useful gifts and the other does not appreciate the significance of the gift or destroys the gift every time the couple gets into an argument. Imagine a relationship where one offers unconditional love and the other offers only crumbs of affection when their partner is “looking good” or “behaving themselves”. Imagine a relationship where one offers steadfast fidelity and the other leaves at the drop of a hat (and then returns, knowing that open arms await them in spite of how cruel they have been).

Build a loving and respectful relationship!

Build a loving and respectful relationship!

Now, consider the relationship with your own body and your own appetite. Read that last paragraph again. Ring any bells?! If it does, then maybe today is the day that you and your appetite/body are ready for some relationship coaching! And I’m not going to pull any punches here : I’m going to be straight with you. Brace yourself. Here it comes… Your appetite-body is the “good guy” here and, as my mum (married to my father for almost 50 years now) would say to me about my partner “It’s great that he accepts you for who you are. Make sure you look after him, make sure you are kind to him, make sure you let him know how much you appreciate him: he’s your rock. And, if times ever get tough, just remember to keep talking.”

(Oh – and if you are packing your bags ready for a guilt trip. Just stop right there! It’s worth remembering that most of us are doing the best we can with the resources we have at the time. Today’s activity isn’t about feeling guilt : it’s about learning, it’s about listening, it’s about dialogue and it’s about starting the process of rebuilding a healthy relationship.)

So are you in? Are you up for re-building your relationship with your body and with your appetite? Great! This next activity is all about your building a healthy relationship with your appetite/body based on a loving connection, honest communication and genuine collaboration (teamwork!)

Consider things from all angles!

Consider things from all angles!

Relationship-Building Barry Manilow-Style 🙂(Really – I’m actually quite a fan of his :)) Do you remember that song of  Barry’s (we are on first-name terms, obviously :P) called “Bermuda Triangle”? There is a GREAT line in that classic that goes something like this : “Bermuda Triangle, try to see things from my angle.” And this next exercise could have been designed by the man himself : it’s all about looking at a relationship from several angles (or perspectives) so that you can achieve a deeper understanding of the relationship and  gain new insights which may help you on your quest to improve the relationship.

 The Set-Up You’ll need 3 chairs for this activity. Take the chairs and place them in a triangle configuration. Chair 1 is the chair for you / you in your head / your mind (you choose whichever works best for you). Chair 2 is the chair for your appetite or your body (you choose whichever works best for you). Chair 3 is the expert chair / the Oprah chair 🙂 / the all-knowing chair or the higher-self chair (choose the description which appeals most to you).

Here’s how to do it! I’m now going to offer you a framework for this exercise and some suggested questions to ask / answer in each chair. However, once you get the hang of it, feel free to play with the process and have the conversation that you need to have to get the kind of relationship you want!

 1. Sit in chair 1 and look at chair 2 (your appetite/body chair). Create a visual representation of your appetite / body in Chair 2 and now CONNECT with your body/appetite in a way that is right for you. You can do this by greeting it or smiling at it – or even waving at it. What’s important is to acknowledge it! Now, talking to your appetite/body, explain how you feel about your body/appetite right now AND explain the kind of relationship you would like to have with your body/appetite instead. Acknowledge your part in the relationship “break-down” (some people actually like to apologise, express love and gratitude at this point. My advice is, just do what feels right for you at each stage of the process). Explain why having a healthy relationship is important to you. If you are clear about some of the actions you are prepared to take to improve the relationship, let your body / appetite know what you are prepared to do.

Tip : do not edit or consciously mediate your words. Let the words that come up, come out 🙂

Worth noting : what feelings come up as you are talking to your body / appetite? As you made the representation of your appetite / body, did it surprise you? Did it remind you of anybody or anything?

It can be a very moving experience!

It can be a very moving experience!

2. Stand up from chair 1 and get ready to “access” your body / appetite. Imagine yourself stepping fully inside the “mind”of your body/appetite – so that you have the experience of “becoming” your appetite / body. Sit in chair 2 and start to communicate with chair 1. This is your chance (appetite / body) to be really heard  Respond to what was said in chair 1, describe the kind of relationship you would like with your mind / your head / you , let chair 1 know what you think about their suggestions for improving the relationship. Offer your own suggestions for improving the relationship.

Tip : to gain the most valuable insights, make sure you are fully associated to the representation of your body / appetite. Really “see” things from your body’s / appetite’s point of view.

Worth noting : what feelings come up as you are talking to chair 1 from chair 2?

3. Now, stand up and move over to chair 3 – I’ll call it the Relationship Expert’s chair. Before sitting down, make a visual representation of the owner of chair 3 and then imagine yourself floating into “the expert”, so that you are fully associated to this position. In this position you are outside the relationship looking in and your value to the relationship is the ability to offer a more dissociated perspective. From this position, answer the following questions : what needs to happen for this relationship to move forwards? How can this couple collaborate better and become a team? What does the head / mind / you have to do in order to build a healthy relationship with the body / appetite ? What could the body / appetite do to support the relationship-building process. What advice / feedback would you have for either chair 1 or chair 2 or the relationship? Give a small task or activity that this couple could do today to start to re-build a collaborative partnership.

Tip : this can be a very powerful position for insights when you are able to remain dissociated from both chair 1 and chair 2.

Worth noting : were you pleasantly surprised at your level of relationship expertise? (It’s not call the Expert Chair for nothing!)

4. Now return to chair 1, fully associating yourself to your head / mind / you . Having heard the views from chair 2 and chair 3, what insights have you gained? What’s changed for you ? How are you feeling about the future of the relationship at this very moment? What’s the next smallest step you can take right now towards building a deep and respectful connection with your body / appetite? Thank both chair 2 and chair 3 for their contributions to the conversation.

Tip : you may want to continue this conversation, spending time in the chairs which give you the greatest insight (that’s usually chair 2 and/or chair 3 :))

Worth noting : write down all your learning in your journal.  You’re beginning to access some of your deepest body wisdom – it’s really worth recording this momentous event!

Sometimes a good honest conversation can transform a relationship. I wonder how this conversation will transform yours. I wonder what you’ll discover that may transform your perception of your body or appetite…

Gotta run 🙂 !

JT

© Jane Talbot 2012

Appetite Awareness Action Adventure!

Get ready to plug into your appetite!

Get ready to plug into your appetite!

Welcome to Day 3 of the 12 Days of Christmas project! (If you are just joining the project now, you can get the full low-down here: https://thighhighbootcamp.com/2012/12/18/welcome-to-the-12-days-of-christmas-project/  and I really recommend that you start the project at Day 1 to get the full benefit!)

Yesterday’s post was all about your getting back into your body so that you could begin to pay attention to your body’s signals (and respect them!). So. Guess where we are heading today? That’s right, you are heading right back inside your body (thunder-roll and clash of dramatic symbols) so that you can begin to connect with your appetite 🙂

 For those of us who struggle with our weight, we are often so busy looking for “outside” solutions (the latest guru, the latest diet, “wonder” shakes, super foods : I don’t really need to go on, as you are probably an expert at this stuff!) that we ignore our own inner guru.

 “What? You are telling me that I’m a guru?” (Just reading your mind there :)) Yes – that’s exactly what I’m telling you : you are a guru. I’m telling you that there is a part of you that is an expert, a highly intelligent source of advice, a complete gold-mine of information. This part of you is constantly communicating with you, constantly sign-posting and constantly giving you feedback on the changing conditions in your body. It provides you with conscious information through your appetite. It tells you when you are hungry, it tells you when you are full, it is capable of naturally regulating itself in accordance with changing physiological conditions.

The problem is that those of us with a history of dieting behind us stopped listening to our inner gurus. When our appetite said “STOP NOW!” We carried on. When our appetite said, “IT’S TIME TO EAT BECAUSE YOU ARE GENUINELY PHYSIOLOGICALLY HUNGRY”, we said “No”. We said “no” because the “outside” gurus said “no snacking” or they said “stick to 3 meals a day” and we said “no” because we wanted to “stay on track”…. And eventually we stopped listening to the inside, we kept overriding the signals .. and after a while we started confusing physiological appetite messages with all sorts of other messages.. (thirst signals, emotional signals..).

So here’s today’s invitation : an Appetite Awareness Action Adventure! You’re going back inside your body to locate your appetite, to learn about it, so that you’ll be able to start listening to it, to start respecting it and to build a respectful connection with it. So pull on your Indiana Jones hat and your Lara Croft boots/Officer John McClane string vests (best I could come up with for the guys :p) and get ready for adventure!

Keep a food diary!

Keep a food diary!

Here’s how to do it : for the next 3 days, keep a food diary. (For those of you sighing in despair, this is not any old food diary:) This diary is a little different because it’s helping you to discover a whole load of other useful stuff and is a form of journaling in its own right).

Every time you get hungry and eat (or don’t eat), do the following ~

 1. If you decide to eat, STOP before you eat.Have a drink of water (this step helps you to develop an awareness of the difference between a hunger signal and a thirst signal). If you are still experiencing hunger, proceed to the next step.

2. Write down any physical feelings you are experiencing and the name of any emotions present in your body. (Also, just notice if there are any feelings/emotions absent that are usually present; and any feelings/emotions present that are usually absent).

3. Record your hunger on a scale of 1-10 (10 being “starving”).

4. If you eat, afterwards write down the name of any physical and/or emotional feelings present (and ,again, notice if any feelings are absent that are normally present. Notice if any feelings are present that are usually absent).

5. After eating, record how satisfied you feel on a scale of 1-10 (10 being totally satisfied, 11+ would indicate having overeaten).

6. Record everything you eat and drink , size of portions and the times you eat.

7. If you undertake any type of physical activity, record the length of time you exercise and your perceived rate of exertion on a scale of 1-10 (10 being “flat out”).

8. Be honest – this diary will give you vital clues for reconnecting with your inner guru!

Brace yourself for enlightenment!

Brace yourself for enlightenment!

Are you curious to find out what you might learn on your adventure? Are you wondering whether you’ll notice any patterns emerging? Are you thinking that this might even help you to develop a closer connection with your body? Are you just a little bit excited at the prospect of developing an acute awareness of the difference between hunger signals and emotional signals? Or are you just raring to get those boots / that string vest on? 🙂 🙂 🙂

Gotta run! 🙂

JT

© Jane Talbot 2012